Harry Kane – who is it?
It’s Gary Cahill!
Harry Kane – Gary Cahill, who?
Now play that knock-knock joke on every Chelsea player except Hazard and you would know exactly how we performed on the pitch!
I am feeling sick while typing this, but, we were completely outplayed and owned by Tottenham Hotspurs (!!!!!!!) of all the side in the league. Seriously, Mauricio Pochettino’s men proved to be too brilliant for us, as we surrendered to a 5-3 defeat and became a source of mockery for all the opposition fans, including Arsenal! F@#k!
Although, there’s no need to, but still, we have to do a players rating and this is how we rate the Blues performance against the mighty (lol) Spurs:
THIBAUT COURTOIS: Rating – 5/10
I don’t know if anything could have changed, with Cech on the goalpost, but it certainly didn’t look like Courtois’ fault. Seriously, although he is world class, but he ain’t a Superman now, is he?
GARY CAHILL: Rating – 2/10
2 points for running around like a headless chicken for 90 minutes! The guy was either drunk or had a hangover or maybe even stoned after he kicked Kane on the back. If I say Cahill got owned by Kane, it would be an understatement of the century! I could write a whole article on Cahill’s performance tonight, but it probably would involve a lot of swearing.
JOHN TERRY: Rating – 3/10
An extra point for scoring that goal in the end otherwise, he was just as bad as Mr. Cahill. The Captain looked lost against the pace of Chadli and Kane and I can’t believe I am saying this but, we were fortunate to concede just 5!
BRANISLAV IVANOVIC: Rating – 4/10
Oh! I almost forgot we were playing a right-back tonight! Ivanovic was at least decent enough in the first half but dropped down to Terry-Cahill level in the second half as Chadli switched to left and destroyed him on the counters!
CESAR AZPILICUETA: Rating – 6/10
The best among the back four. At least the Spaniard gave his all and kept on running till the final whistle! Was pretty good at left back actually and rarely allowed Tottenham to break away in the wings.
NEMANJA MATIC: Rating – 6/10
Honestly, playing as the lone holder in the second half, there wasn’t much the Serbian could have done, as he was completely isolated, with Chelsea committing all the men forward. He could have done better shielding the defense though, but with our CB’s in this kind of form, he probably gave up on that!
CESC FABREGAS: Rating – 7/10
The Spaniard was pretty good and apart from Hazard, he was the only one providing the creativity from the middle. Played a nice one-two with the Belgian that resulted in the 2nd Chelsea goal.
EDEN HAZARD: Rating – 9/10
You have got to feel for him! The Belgian had a brilliant game scoring a goal and providing an assist, but more than that the winger was absolutely fantastic, trying hard, giving his all. Too sad that our defenders weren’t at the same page as him! One of his memorable performances.
OSCAR: Rating – 4/10
He was subbed at the start of the second half. Wasn’t good in his 45 minutes, missed a goal scoring chance, failed to close down Harry Kane for the first Spurs goal!
WILLIAN: Rating – 5/10
Gave his usual ‘Willian’ Performance. Huffed and Puffed, tried everything without any end product, and at the end, just wasn’t good enough. Seriously, we need a Right Winger!
DIEGO COSTA: Rating – 5/10
5 points for his first half performance where he looked set to grab a hat-trick! Zero points for his second half performance where he looked as if he was playing for Spain!
RAMIRES: Rating – 6/10
Came on for Oscar at the start of the second half and immediately looked good. Considering, he probably lacks match fitness, this was a good performance from the Brazilian.
MOHAMED SALAH: Rating – 3/10
Willian made way for him in the final 20 minutes to provide that speed on the wings, failed miserably in doing so!
If you want to write articles & share your views with your fellow Blues, contact us at – firstname.lastname@example.org
Edited By: Harshal Ahire